Twerking and other gyrations

I have been postponing my comments on the latest stunt pulled by Miley Cyrus out of decency.  However, I do have some opinions as to what needs to be done about her and an entire parade of young people who are influencing the youth of our nation.

At what point did Miley transform from Hanna Montana (wholesome child idol) to Rhonda Roadhoe (unwholesome twenty yr old slut)?  It must have been something she ate or maybe it was a genetic thing.  From past performances by her parents (Billy Ray) we can tell that the apple didnt fall far from the tree.  Is the way to resurrect a flagging career the performance of something ridiculous?  apparently so.

Justin Bieber is another one of the same ilk.  What this boy needs is someone to take him out behind the wood shed and introduce him to the pine board of good behavior.  His mother seems to care but claims there is not much she can do.  She may be right. She will eventually get to visit him in prison and maybe the warden will have some suggestions.

It has been brought to my attention that the rules for raising children have changed somewhat since the days of me being a child.  It seems that the sage advice of a grandparent or other older relative is no longer either wanted or needed by those who are in direct charge of raising our youth.  A kindly suggestion from a grandparent can be deemed as being nosey or butting in to business not theirs.  In my formative years a suggestion by my grandfather would have had the same weight as the 10 things carved on the stone tablet and given to Moses as law of the land.  I would have directly changed my behavior to adapt to the suggestion.

The parents of many of the young people who flood our media with their antics claim that once a child reaches a certain age there isnt much a parent can do.  That is probably true if you missed the opportunity, during their formative years, to instill either respect for their elders or fear of those same people.  I am not sure which I instilled in my children, I would hope respect but will accept fear if need be, but I think that if I strongly suggested that they change their behavior some thought would be given to the to the ramifications of what would happen if they didnt.  Coming to Thanksgiving dinner and finding that your plate had been ceremoniously broken for some transgression is a powerful reminder of who brought you in to the world.  No one wants to eat out on the patio off a paper plate because you didnt mind your parent.  I dont care how old you are.

Miley didnt invent twerking.  It is a dance move popularized by belly dancers in the middle ages during the Byzantine times.  It has been adopted to the modern pole dancers joints and will undoubtedly be used for years to come.  It is a dance move used to illicit money from the audience.  She has used it for a similar reason except it was to arouse a flagging career, thus raising money.

Why do I care about what Miley does?  I dont.  I think it influences my granddaughter.  She and I had a conversation about Justin recently during her visit and she indicated that she was turned off by his behaviour.  That is good but she was still aware of his actions and the harm has seeped in.  I dont expect her to ever twerk but she has seen how it is done and it has been given a name that suddenly is appearing in the media every 30 seconds so the harm it can do is present in her mind as well as the mind of all our youth.  We can’t keep them in the closet until they grow up but it is getting harder to raise one without the help of the entire community and sometimes the community is a slum.

GARY

Conglomeration

The last week was highlighted by a visit from our granddaughter.  Much of our interaction with her has been reported on.  Since she left, well, it has been a bit boring.  Boredom is something that is creeping up on me more often. 

As I have written on many occasions, I do much of the grocery shopping for our kitchen.  This exposes me to all the magazines at the check out counter and thus exposes me to the antics of all the hollywood stars and starlettes.  I pretty much know who is pregnant, by whom they think might have impregnated them and the possiblity of them receiving spousal support.  Last week I read where one young mom was requesting spousal support of $ 46,000.00 per month to support the children in the style they need to be supported in.  Who in the wide wide world of greed needs that kind of money to feed, house and clothe their kids.  As a grocery shopper I could show that lady how to eat on about $ 100.00 per week and she could see by my size that I do know how to buy filling food.  I have been thinking of forming a company that would investigate home life situations that are involving spousal support and could report back to the family relations judge just what I think adequate support might be.  A toddler does not need to eat a chateu-briand steak more than once per week.  I have found that what they really like is chicken nuggets.  My calculator will not even register the actual number of chicken nuggets you could buy with $ 46,000.00 per month.  Clothing is expensive but not that expensive.  As you will note from the pictures on the front of National Enquirer, many of the estranged spouses, male and female, wear less than a full suit of clothing anyway.  They are normally dressed in shorts, a gimme t-shirt and flip flops.  It has been photographically proven that most of the stars dont wear any underwear so they cant spend much on that,  Same with swim suits.  You need a good car to haul the kids to soccer practice but do you actually need a $ 200,000.00 Lambourghini?  Could you get by with a nice Ford Escort?  A suburban can haul a whole little soccer team including the balls.  We need a nice home.  With that I whole heartedly agree.  But is is necessary to have 10 bedrooms, 6 bathroom, an inhouse gym and bowling alley and swimming pool.  Somebody is gonna drown in that swimming pool because of lack of attention by the parent that has physical custody cause that parent is too busy trying to figure out how to spend $ 46k each month.  They would be afraid to not spend it all because they might lower the amount.  How much toilet paper do you have to buy to fully equip a house with 6 bathrooms.  We have 2 1/2 baths and our tp purchases are astronomical.  How many sets of towels would be the right amount to buy.  Could you steal enough motel samples to keep 6 bathrooms equipped with baby soaps, shampoos, body lotion and shower caps?  $ 46,000.00 per month, indeed.

I cant even get started on my favorite hollywood megastars, the Kardashians.  They make a certain spot on my body want to dip snuff. Nuff said.

Good report.  A fortuitous comment on Facebook has allowed me to locate a highschool friend that I have spent the last 10 years looking for.  Guess what, he lives in the city where most of the class of 1961 live.  Frisco, Tx.  I havent been to Frisco but I am going up there to see what is there.  How could a class of a tad over 100 be so drawn to a suburb of Dallas?  We will try to get to the bottom of this question.

Gary

“THE JESSICA SIMPSON SYNDROME”

As I reported last week, our granddaughter is visiting us.  We were told at the start of her visit that she did not eat anything but chicken.  SHE DID NOT EAT BEEF.  Okay, I have been busting my chef heiney all week cooking chicken in a non repetative manner.  Last nite we even had coq au vin.  Not one of my normal dishes but came out good and when asked how she liked it, well it was “interesting”.  Grandchildren’s code for I didnt like it but am too polite to tell you.  It was actually delicious.

Tonight we went to Luby’s.  Figured, hey, everybody can get what they want and Dorothy and I can have fried liver and onions on the Luann.  She was in the front of the line and bold as you please ordered chicken fried steak.  When we sat down I, of course, informed her that I thought she didnt eat beef.  Answer, I dont.  Chicken fried steak was my retort.  She immediately and without a pause said, Duh, Chicken, Fried.  After some discussion she realized that she was eating beef.  Now we are waiting until 2:00am, the time she normally starts wailing with pain from eating beef.  Advised that people who wake me in the middle of the night in pain, get caned.  Has already asked for a Zanax and we havent been out of Lubys more than 30 minutes.  I have asked her to research the meaning of psychomatic symtoms.

We have generally had a good visit.  They have shopped, gone to the movies and did girl things.  I have mostly watched the food channel for tips on how to cook chicken.  I didnt find one that turned cube steak into chicken so will keep looking.  Maybe a new cookbook is in order.  “The dietary needs of the American Teen”  or “What am I allergic to this week?

Chuy the Cook

Life after dirt track racing

We survived a nite at the dirt track races.  Those things are loud, fast and generally just motors with some metal tacked on for looks.  Enjoyed the show but found out rather quickly that we are not NASCAR types.  I never saw so many pairs of motorcycle boots, wifebeater t-shirts and tattoos in my life.  And that was on the women.  They had an auction at half time to raise money for the Shriners and the auctioned goods consisted of tow-ropes.  A few oil changes were thrown in for variety.  They were having $ 1.00 Tecate beer nite at the concession stand so that was impressive.  Young teens are always the same and will never change.  On Saturday nite both sexes dress in what they construe as their best costume and parade up and down the front of the grandstands.  Makes no difference what type of sporting event it is.  The girls are in a gaggle, dressed in their shortest, tightest shorts and tops and the young men are usually in their best jeans, tightest t=shirt and best looking footwear.  Neither group ever sees a minute of the sporting event.  There is giggling and swaggering like peacocks and guinea hens.  A good time is had by all.

Visit from granddaughter report.

I have survived my first nite of “Chicken Week”.  Did it with a lovely dish of chicken and dumplings and a nice green salad.  Tonight she eats with her aunt.  Tomorrow night it will be roast turkey breast (qualifies as chicken) with dressing and green beans.  She doesnt particularly care for green beans but hey, we have to eat too.  Tuesday night will be a surprise as we will have chicken coq au vin made with a lovely red wine, some nice roasted pearl onions and fingerling potatoes.  I figure about 3 days of counting carbs will be time for a break.  Wednesday nite will be shredded chicken tacos, quacamole and pinto beans.  She likes cheese so we will have some of that.  She has asked me what I have against mozzarella cheese.  Told her it was Italian and didnt particulary care for the italians.  That seemed to appease her.  Thursday nite we will eat at Lubys which will allow everyone the opportunity to get exactly what they want, me included.  She doesnt like liver and onions, no matter what creature the liver is taken from.  She needs to eat at Lubys more often so she can see where elderly people like to eat.  She may have to take care of Dorothy and I at some point in time. I want her to know the background of the Luann special so it wont be a complete surprise to her when she has to order for her aged grandparents.

They are at church now so the house is quiet.  I think I will go to the sporting goods store or the lumber yard and look around.  They are going shopping the rest of the week so want to get mine done before they spend this months social security check on school clothes or purses.

Chuy the grandfather.

The Circle and other rememberances

There has been much written lately about the “circle” at the old Pecos army air force base and many more people admit to going there than would have ever admitted it at the time we were of an age to go.  There were also other areas in that same vicinity, known as the “freshman circle”, the square, etc.  All were places where it was fun to go as long as no one knew you were there except if everybody went and then it was absolutely the place to be and you wanted everyone to know you were there.  A phenomenon.

Pecos had a number of such mysterious places.  The old beer joint north of town kind of in the vicinity of the acid delinter plant.  Did anyone ever go there?  I guess not.  I remember one local tough who chanced going there and it was the beginning of the demise of his reputation as a terminal bad a–.  “Catman”.  Some one beat him up one night out at that beer joint and his head looked like a squash.  He wasnt so tough after that.  That was always an example to me of why boys shouldnt attempt to be men before they really are.  Boys are rarely as bad and mean as the men they run into in such places.

COS (change of subject)

Our granddaughter arrived last evening for a week visit with us.  We havent had her often so it will be somewhat of a treat.  I can tell already that we are going to have a minor adjusting period over the food situation.  In my efforts to be a good host I always consider my house guest’s dietery needs.  In making my weekly shopping list I asked her what she ate.  She eats chicken.  What she does not eat is beef, of any kind.  It makes her want to vomit, makes her stomach hurt, her eyes blur and several other symptoms,  She does not eat fish because it smells.  She does not eat pork because it is from an unclean animal.  I was unaware that there were any muslims in my family but I guess there is.  Her vegetable list of likes is about the same length.  She eats brocolli. She does not eat green beans, green peas, will eat cauliflower if prepared as if it was mashed potatoes and would not touch a brussel sprout if I took a cane pole to her.  Asparagas is not on the list of things she will eat.  She is carb counting so that eliminates the use of potatoes of any kind.  So, we are pretty much down to chicken and brocolli.  I have a massive collection of cookbooks but I can assure you there are not over 5 recipes that contain those two ingredients.  She finally admitted that she had brought along some dietary supplements that could be mixed with milk, just in case she found out that she had arrived in Biafra, Africa or a place where chicken and brocolli was unknown.  Oh, did I mention that she is a teen?

To enhance my enjoyment of my recent semi-retirement I purchased, yesterday, a hunting/camping/fishing vehicle.  A 2004 Chevy Tahoe.  It is a fine automobile that has every bell and whistle on it that an outdoorsman like myself would possibly want or need.  We have Bose radio, cd, xm, player and more radio buttons than I know what to do with.  I bet I am going to be able to pick up KOMA when I get the chance to play with it.  I loaded it up with Hank Williams, Leann Rimes, Sons of the Pioneers and Elton John.  There is nothing that will clear out a campfire quicker than someone turning on an Elton John album.  I am fairly certain Elton wears pink camo.  It has plenty of room for my water can, my ice chest, my camp chair, cook stove, tent, and various places for weapons and knives and hatchets.  Throw in a few cast iron pots and my ole skillet and I am ready to go.  Now I need for the weather to break a bit and the first cold front to come through and I am on the road again.  Dorothy thinks I have probably gone around the bend in the river of sanity but she going to the stock car races tonight, for the first time, just to be a team player.  Good woman, even if she doesnt own a boat.

Vasco de Cowan, explorer of mind and country